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Gav.

• Tiger Woods recently spent a good bit of time in the Virgin Islands. There is now a proposal on the table to rename them "The Islands"


• Gatorade: "Is it in you?" Nike: "Just do it". And they say advertising doesn't work.

• How does Tiger keep track of what hole he is playing?By the tattoo on her back

• Whats the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa?? Santa only does 3 ho's!!


• Tiger announced yesterday he was glad his wife bashed him in the face with a nine iron. She was about to tee off both of his balls when he woke up at 2am.


• Tiger Woods announced a break from golf today to fix his family and because he is embarrassed. You think you are embarrassed now? Wait until your kids are old enough to google your name.


• In a statement just released, Tiger Woods said he is going to take an "indefinite" break from professional golf. However, he will still try to get in a few holes.


• Why hasn't Tiger been on Oprah yet? She's not his type.


• The black in Tiger caused him to buy the Cadillac Escalade, the asian in him crashed it.


• This from today's Nike marketing press release: Not only are we standing by Tiger Woods now and in the future, we would like to thank Tiger for helping create a new product line for Nike. The Nike Golf Helmet.


• What does Tiger Woods use to clean his ball's? A blonde.


• How do you tell Tiger Woods ball's from the other golfer's? His have teeth marks on them.


• What do women love most about Tiger? His swing.


• I hate Tiger Woods. Now when I tell her I'm going for a game of golf, she knows what I'm really getting up to!


• When Tiger Woods was asked if he had any regrets, he replied "Of course. I wish I had two penises."

more trouble and comedy about golfer Tiger Woods

It seems that jokes about tiger woods and golf have been much appreciated, here's the latest:


Tiger and Elin have signed a new prenuptual agreement. According to the new contract, the next time Tiger plays a round, Elin will hand him his balls.

I guess Tiger wishes now he hadn't shown Elin how to get more power in her swing.....

What's the difference between Elin Woods and 85% of of the PGA tour pros? She beat Tiger....

Tiger's putter made him a billionaire. Tiger's little putter will make him 1/2 a billionaire.

previous tiger woods jokes: Tiger Woods Jokes.

A Bottle of Merlot

A man asked a waiter to take a bottle of Merlot to an unusually
attractive woman sitting alone at a table in a cozy little restaurant.

So the waiter took the Merlot to the woman and said, 'This is from the gentleman who is seated over there.' ..and indicated the sender with a nod of his head.

She stared at the wine coolly for a few seconds, not looking at the
man, then decided to send a reply to him by a note. The waiter, who was lingering nearby for a response, took the note from her and conveyed it to the gentleman.

The note read:
'For me to accept this bottle, you need to have a Mercedes in your garage, a million dollars in the bank and 7 inches in your pants.'

After reading the note, the man decided to compose one of his own in return. He folded the note, handed it to the waiter and instructed himto deliver it to the lady.

It read: 'Just to let you know things aren't always what they appear to be, I have a
Ferrari Maranello, BMW Z8, Mercedes CL600, and a Porsche Turbo in my several garages;
I have beautiful homes in Aspen , Miami , and a 10,000 acre ranch in Louisiana.
There is over twenty million dollars in my bank account and portfolio.

But, not even for a woman as beautiful as you are, would I cut off three inches.
Just send the bottle back!